Revelation: Part Two

It's true. No coffee. 29 days. And counting.

April 10 was the last time I had a cup of coffee. In fact, it was the last time I had any form of caffeine. That's right... No cola, no tea, and no chocolate either. Can you believe it? Do you know how hard it is to have 6 kids in the house at Easter and not eat chocolate? Torture!

Now, those who know me might be considering stocking up on water and non-perishables as this has generally been thought to be one of the signs of the Apocalypse. But you might want to read on before you max out your Home Depot card on building supplies for your bomb shelter...

As Chana quite correctly pointed out to me, I've done this little "decaffeinated" routine before... It was 2 years ago, almost to the day, that I started an impromptu "Caffeine De-Tox Program" which lasted a whole 30 days. You can read about it here, here, here, and here. The reasons are the same this time around and, as with last time, I will definitely be going back to drinking coffee sometime in the near future. For now, however, I'm curious to see how long this will last. Now that the physical addiction has been broken (the headaches were a killer!) and the habit of always having a coffee cup in my hand is almost gone, I'm sure I'll be able to go as long as I choose.

We'll see.

So, the name of the blog will stay the same... The caffeine may have left my bloodstream, but I can assure you it hasn't left my mind! And when I do decide to sip from the blessed chalice of java once again, I want my first one to be memorable, so be prepared with some good suggestions, okay?

Revelation: Part One

The codes have been cracked! The puzzles are solved! And, most importantly, the secret has been discovered! All that remains is to reveal it to the rest of you...

Wudrich emailed me early Friday morning with his very analytical breakdown of all the clues given, summarizing with an accurate deduction as to the nature of my clean little secret. I'm quite happy that he did, too, because the next puzzle would have involved me breaking into the Louvre and defacing some highly prized works of art and I was beginning to get cold feet about the whole thing!

Unfortunately, a busy weekend prevented me from posting this any sooner... But better late than never, right? So, without further ado, here is Wudrich's email, word-for-word:

Everything in quotes is direct from your page

"I have a secret." - Not anymore.

"It's not a dirty little secret. True, it is a relatively small one, but quite clean, really." - Depends on which part you talk about. That filter is questionable.

"Some people already know my secret, but I've been lying to the rest of you for 16 days now." - here is where it gets interesting.

"For the first few days, my secret was nothing but one big headache... First there was the dull throbbing in my forehead, followed by tension around my temples. Before long, it was the sharp, stabbing pain behind my left eye that I've come to know as a "cluster migraine"." - also known as Caffeine withdrawl

"... I still can't seem to get it off my mind. I get up in the morning, shower, dress, and start thinking about my secret." - What else do you think of after doing those things.

"... friendship began when I was 16 years old... (...if I'm not mistaken, over breakfast) that a long-lasting relationship was forged." - Or perhaps Folgered?

"... in High School, I really only saw my friend on weekends. In college, we were practically inseparable. When I was unemployed, we got together a lot less frequently." - obviously the last due to lack of funds.

"... I've become more of a "home body", put on some much-needed weight, (I'd say) and become a Dad. My friend hasn't really done anything dramatic, per se, but has definitely become a lot less complicated than when we met. In fact, I think some of the very things that I found most appealing originally are completely gone now. Yet the friendship remains because I can appreciate this friend for what they really are when everything else is stripped away." - hmmm some body went black and didn't go back.

"Lately, though, I've been thinking that maybe we hang out together too much." - oh addiction, is there anything better

"I've recently found myself feeling kind of "needy" toward my friend, and I don't want to be that person." - Isn't admitting it the first step?

"So, I decided to "take a break" " - step two

In conclusion Dr. Watson the black liquid in the large cup is the culprit. Hopefully going on 25 days now you have quit the coffee habit and are no longer a caffeinated mind, well maybe not completely. You never know how long it takes for its affects to wear off and those cola products can offer a substitute. Well, I say congratulations if I am right or "wwwhhhaaaaatttt????" if I am wrong. Either way I can't wait for more clues.

Well, since the secret is out, there won't be any more clues. However, there are more details to follow... I promise...

Stay tuned...

Clue #2: A Poem

Making You Work For It

In light of all the hype surrounding Dan Brown's "The Da Vinci Code" and the ever-approaching release date of the movie by the same name, I've decided to play a bit of a game along those lines...

For those of you who haven't read the book, it involves a series of ever-more-complicated codes and ciphers that lend clues to the ultimate puzzle of the location of the Holy Grail (there's more to it than that, like religious zealots try to reveal supposed Church cover-ups, but you get the picture).

Now, about my game...

As most of you probably know, I have a clean little secret. Well, what better way to reveal said secret than by letting you figure it out for yourself? You see, this way, you get to have a bit of fun and I get to keep my secret a little longer. The fact that it's a cheap way to get some easy blog mileage is irrelevant...

Hidden in my next few blog entries, then, will be puzzles or codes that will lead you to a series of clues. These clues can then be used to figure out what I've been keeping under my hat for 21 days now.

You may discuss within the comments, if you wish, and I will acknowledge the first reader to properly decipher each clue. Once all the clues have been given, though, I would encourage you to email me with your answers, just so you don't accidentally give it away to someone else (how many times have you seen that happen on Wheel of Fortune?).

Will there be a prize for figuring out the secret? Good question! Right now, I don't know... But you'll be the first to know when I find out!

So, sharpen your wits, get your pencils and Ovaltine Decoder Rings ready, and see who among you will be the first to uncover Cuppojoe's Clean Little Secret.

(Certain individuals are exempt, as you already know the secret... You know who you are.)

And a Jam-Packed 3 Years It's Been!

I'd like to start by saying that I'm not your typical male and I didn't miss my anniversary with Chana. In fact, I had this really creative idea for a blog post to celebrate "our day", but ran out of time to pull it off before going out to dinner with her. Does it count that I told her all about what could have been? Well, it counted in her books, and she encouraged me to go ahead and do it anyway. But, since the whole idea was to surprise her, I think the moment has passed. Instead, I figured I'd do a "Day One of Our Fourth Year Together" post.

Here we go.

I can believe that we've only just passed the 3 year mark... It feels like a lot longer than that... and I mean that in a good way. With everything that has happened since we met, all the places we've gone, all the memories we've made together, it feels more like we've been a couple for a decade! Never before in my life have I ever had so much fun as I've had since I met Chana! In the short time I've had the priviledge of calling her my girlfriend we have:

• Spent a weekend in Radium... Her very first trip to British Columbia.
  
• Driven 7 and a half hours to Kelowna and had our caricatures drawn in the park.
  
• Spent a romantic weekend in a Polynesian Fantasy Room at the Fantasyland Hotel in West Edmonton Mall.
  
• Watched our kids play together in Sylvan Lake while spending a weekend in a cottage.
  
• Made countless trips to the mountains and Banff National Park so she could visit her favorite waterfall.
  
• Watched Killer Whales swim within a few feet of our boat off the San Juan Islands.
  
• Marveled at genuine Egyptian artifacts at the Royal British Columbia Museum.
  
• Taken pictures of our feet in almost every place we've visited together.
  
• Hunted down 2 street signs: Chandler St. and Bing Ave. ("Friends" fans will get it...)
  
• Had our portraits drawn in Stanley Park.
  
• Tried (unsuccessfully) to get good pictures at every one of our kids' school concerts.
  
• Collected many turtles (her) and chess boards (me).
  
• Worked through her near-blindness following laser eye surgery.
  
• Walked along the main streets of little towns near our city, just for the sake of doing it.
  
• Left the house at 4:30 in the morning on a weekend, just to go see a sunrise in the country.
  
• Used binoculars to find our neighborhoods from high atop the Calgary Tower.
  
• Introduced me to platanos fritos... Yum!
  
• Shown her every house I lived in as a child (and there are 16, spread across 3 cities and 2 provinces!).
  
• Spent 3 magical Christmas' together with our 6 kids.

That is by no means the entire list, because there's just no room or time for it all! But I think it gives you a good idea just how awesome the last 3 years have been for us!

In all, it's a great feeling to have finally found someone that I can truly call a "companion"... Someone I can share life with (ups and downs) and never get tired of doing it. I can't wait to see what kind of memories we make in the next three years!

I love you, Chana.

I Have This Friend...

One of my greatest friendships began when I was 16 years old. This friend wasn't exactly "new" to me, but it wasn't until my uncle formally introduced us (it was a Saturday morning, if I'm not mistaken, over breakfast) that a long-lasting relationship was forged.

While I was in High School, I really only saw my friend on weekends. In college, we were practically inseparable. When I was unemployed, we got together a lot less frequently. Ever since I became a "productive member of society", though, I've seen my friend almost everyday.

As with most friends, we've both changed a lot over the years... I've become more of a "home body", put on some much-needed weight, and become a Dad. My friend hasn't really done anything dramatic, per se, but has definitely become a lot less complicated than when we met. In fact, I think some of the very things that I found most appealing originally are completely gone now. Yet the friendship remains because I can appreciate this friend for what they really are when everything else is stripped away.

Lately, though, I've been thinking that maybe we hang out together too much. Maybe I see more of this friend than is actually healthy. Maybe I should think about making some new friendships. It's not that I don't like my friend anymore... far from it, in fact... But sometimes you just need a little space. You know?

I've recently found myself feeling kind of "needy" toward my friend, and I don't want to be that person. I don't want to give the impression that we have to hang out. I'd rather just go back to the casual friendship we started out in. So, I decided to "take a break" from my friend for a while and see what happens.

Oh, and by the way, did I mention that this friend plays a pivotal role in my clean little secret? I can't end the post without dropping that clue, now can I?

Shhh...

I have a secret.

It's not a dirty little secret. True, it is a relatively small one, but quite clean, really. Come to think of it, I'd say this particular secret could nearly be marketed as "Mountain Fresh" were it a detergent of some sort. But it's not soap, just a secret.

I have a clean little secret.

Some people already know my secret, but I've been lying to the rest of you for 16 days now. For over two weeks I have been aware that most of you are living under a false impression, and I've done nothing to correct the situation. So, since omission of the truth is still a lie, I am a liar.

I'm a liar with a clean little secret.

For the first few days, my secret was nothing but one big headache... First there was the dull throbbing in my forehead, followed by tension around my temples. Before long, it was the sharp, stabbing pain behind my left eye that I've come to know as a "cluster migraine".

Nasty.

My secret is no longer painful to me, but I still can't seem to get it off my mind. I get up in the morning, shower, dress, and start thinking about my secret. I go to work, sit down at my desk, and the first thing that pops into my head is my secret. Break time comes and I chat with a few co-workers, but the only thing on my mind is my secret.

Now, the time is near to let go of the secret. Soon I will reveal to all what has been occupying my thoughts all these 16 days. Before long you will all understand how, and why, I have been letting you all believe a lie. And who knows? You may even understand and forgive me for it.

I am a liar with a clean little secret that will soon be known...